Archive for scarlett johansen

The Babes of the 2008 Teen Choice Awards

I say babes loosely because actually these are some of the worst dressed, worst styled chicks I’ve seen in a while. Photos follow the comments.

Rachel Bilson. Boring in an ugly dress. I think she has potential but she sure doesn’t show much of it here.

Scarlett Johansson has a pretty smile. Other than that there is nothing special here. She looks like this all the time when on the red carpet. Is she ashamed of her hair? Why is it always pulled back in a granny bun? And she has a fabulous chest. Is it too much to ask to show it off? Her legs are not pretty. Her dress is not pretty. And her shoes are boring. I know there is more potential here than this.

Fergie in a colorful sack. The woman with some of the nicest stems in entertainment and she chooses to wear this bag. Inexplicable.

Katharine McPhee looks really nice. She’s sophisticated and sexy looking. The dress is perfect for showing off those fantastically shaped and tanned legs. She looks great.

Kristen Bell was gorgeous in her little pink skirt. She was showing plenty of leg and was strapped into some sexy high heels. That was some nice work.

Hayden Pantettiere is another chick wearing those awful full length moo moo dresses. They are the bane of female objectifiers everywhere. I’m not fan of Hayden’s so it’s not a big deal but when real hot chicks start wearing them it will be a problem.

Blake Lively clearly thought she was going to a toga party. Yet another fashion misstep from the tall leggy one.

Brittney Snow got the memo about wearing an ugly dress. Her shoes were heinous. And what’s with the veins a-popping in her legs? Looks like a road map down there.

Summer Glau clearly read the memo as well. She looks pretty and the cleavage is nothing to ignore, but damn at the long flowing dresses. Just awful stuff.

Vanessa Hudgens looks hot. I like the short skirt and the high heels are sexy. But she looks and is way too young for any meaningful interest I can give her.

Shenae Grimes looked smoking hot. I mean, she was beautiful yet her dress was serious crap. At least she showed off her legs. They are pretty nice. I’d like to see her put a little more size on that scrawny body of hers but all in all she’s got a lot of potential.

Kim Kardashian does not look that hot. What the hell happened to her hair? I can’t tell definitively but it looks like she whacked off her beautiful mane. The dress is a crime that covers up a pretty nice body. The only saving grace is some fairly sexy high heels. This is a mess.

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Scarlett Johanssen Rocks…Not Really

Being that I am a guy and not gay, you would think that I would be part of the Scarlett Johansen is sexy and hot and awesome! club. Alas, this is not to be. I’ve seen a couple of her movies and found her boring. I’ve also heard her singing and found it to be boring. I have seen her body and found it not to be boring. But a large set of tits really doesn’t do it for me and my female objectification purposes. It’s funny about magazines and Hollyweird and the media. They promote these women like they are some incredible piece of meat but the fact is I could go into virtually any mall in any city of the United States and come out with a chick way hotter than anything in Hollywood this side of the Kate Beckinsale/Charlize Theron duo.

So now Scarlett wants to lend her singing talents to the world. I really hate when these actresses get popular and they decide not only do they need to act, but they need to sing. Or vice-versa, thank you very much Britney, Jessica, et.al. And of course nothing is complete until you get your own line of shoes and perfume. Total over-exposure. So good luck Scarlett. You now have the ability to bore me in two distinct ways.

Scarlett Johansen

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